Kirk Exposed, Starfleet Complicit

BREAKING NEWS: Captain James T. Kirk’s assertion that he received commendation for “original thinking” while attending Starfleet Academy is under renewed scrutiny. Reprimanded and facing expulsion, Kirk, who until only recently held the rank of admiral, is alleged to have exploited, and possibly acted in unison with as a member of, a false-flag incident in an attempt to expunge his record of academic cheating and disobedience as a cadet at the academy. Not wishing to face backlash in the aftermath of his supposed “heroics,” anonymous sources state that Kirk’s immediate superiors covered-up and falsified documentation on his behalf. Further, the same sources claim that on several occasions throughout his storied career, Kirk has collaborated, colluded and copulated with known foreign agents of numerous alien species.

Captain James T. Kirk, in an undated photo file courtesy of Starfleet Command

Allegations also have surfaced that Kirk used blackmail against a superior on at least one, possibly two, occasions while serving as an active-duty admiral, in order to yet again assume and secure a starship command. No witnesses have come forward to corroborate these accusations, and any attempts to reach the alleged victims have been futile. A former transporter chief, who wishes to remain anonymous because they are not authorized to comment on the matter, says that one such potential witness perished in a suspicious transporter accident prior to the dubious, and still classified, V’ger crisis. During that incident, Captain Will Decker, son of the late famed Commodore Matt Decker, and newly assigned navigator Lieutenant Ilia were declared missing in action under mysterious circumstances. Another transporter officer states, in a separate encounter, that a member of Kirk’s crew harassed and threatened him before the theft, and subsequent destruction, of the USS Enterprise.

As to the latter incident, previous investigations have uncovered numerous ill-advised decisions on the part of Kirk and his crew that allowed sensitive material to fall into the hands of and be used by enemy forces. The Klingon High Council repeatedly has denied involvement in any such operations, including charges of espionage and treaty violations. The material in question centered on the controversial Project Genesis, a shadowy bioengineering research project headed by none other than one of Kirk’s several former lovers, Dr. Carol Marcus, and their late son, David. Others involved in this operation allegedly included the dangerously fearsome 20th century ruler and tyrant, Khan Noonien Singh, whose life Kirk once spared despite his merciless seizure of the Enterprise on a previous mission. Further, there even is speculation that Singh inauspiciously, if not inexplicably, played a role in the aforementioned earlier false-flag incident; however, that cannot be confirmed at this time.

Request for comment from Kirk, members of his crew, Starfleet Command and the Vulcan embassy have gone unanswered. A statement from Ambassador Sarek’s press secretary, transmitted via Federation channels, did state it seemed logical for Kirk’s reinstatement to command of a starship. 

©2018 Steve Sagarra